Court okays release of 'My Watch' by Olusegun Obasanjo

Thursday, April 16, 2015

A Federal Capital Territory High Court sitting in Apo, Abuja, has okayed the release of My Watch by former President ObasanjoObasanjo’s. 

Justice Valentine Ashi ordered ‎on the release of the book, which had been in the custody of the Nigerian Customs Service following an injunction he slammed late last year following a complaint by a chieftain of the Peoples Democratic Party, Chief Buruji Kashamu.

However, the judge set aside the order of injunction on Monday upon an application by Obasanjo’s lawyer, Chief Kanu Agabi (SAN). ‎In doing so, the court barred the Nigerian Customs Service from collecting demurrage on the books for the period they had been in its custody.

Vanguard reports that the court upheld Agabi’s argument that the applicant, a Peoples Democratic Party chief in Ogun State, Buruji Kashamu, who is currently pursuing a N20bn libel suit against Obasanjo in the same court, suppressed vital facts to obtain the order.

Kashamu‎, had on December 10, 2014, obtained the injunction from the court through an ex parte application which he filed in his N20bn libel suit against Obasanjo.

Kashamu had predicated his prayer on the argument that part of the book related to the subject matter of the libel suit – a letter dated December 2, 2013 written by Obasanjo to President Goodluck Jonathan.

Kashamu had instituted the libel suit against Obasanjo having been dissatisfied with his being described by the former President in the letter which was widely published in the electronic and print media as a fugitive wanted for drug offences in the United States of America.

On December 8, 2014, Justice Ashi granted an ex parte application restraining Obasanjo from publishing the book pending the determination of the libel suit. But Obasanjo went ahead to present the book to the public in Lagos, an act which the court held on December 10, 2014, as contemptuous.

Following the development the court ordered security and law enforcement agencies including ‎customs to confiscate the book anywhere it was found.

‎The judge in his ruling on Obasanjo’s application on Monday upheld Agabi’s argument that the order of injunction was wrongly made. Agabi had maintained that the court made the order w‎ithout jurisdiction.

He said:

 “The single ground of this application is that, in a case of libel, an interlocutory injunction does not lie to restrain publication in the face of a defendant pleading justification. 

“The defendant (Obasanjo) is pleading justification. In paragraph 24 of our counter-affidavit, the defendant said his claim about the plaintiff is correct, true and justified from records available in the federal court of the United States.”

He said the court had “issued without jurisdiction” adding, “the moment an interlocutory is granted, the issue is prejudiced, fair hearing is prejudiced.”

He also argued that the court could only validly bar publication in a libel suit after the case of libel was proven against the defendant.‎

The case has been adjourned to May 25.

Wizkid’s car hasn’t been paid for, Genevieve owns her Ghana mansion in her dreams - Etcetera reveals

Saturday, February 28, 2015

Hmm... Etcetera comes again for Nigerian celebrities. Does this guy ever get tired? There's only one way to find out – time will tell... 

And all liars shall go to hell – Rev 21:8.

Again, I’m going to go out on a limb here to talk on a subject that may not be very popular or nice to Nigerian celebs, especially the guilty ones. I have said it severally that just because someone is a celebrity doesn’t mean they are smart. They may have a talent or skill but many of them are not smart especially when it involves their finances. The old saying, “your lies will come back to haunt you” has never been more true than the recent cases of D’banj, Iyanya and Wizkid who are being kicked out of their homes after lying they owned the properties. The residents of blogosphere boulevard were stunned when the news broke that D’banj got an eviction notice from his landlord and was also said to be highly indebted.

Yes, it is hard to believe that someone of D’banj’s status could actually be thrown out of his house. But for those who know that the Nigerian entertainment industry is built on lies and more lies, it didn’t come as a surprise or a case of a cranky landlord. Entertainers are well rehearsed liars. They are not what they make you believe they are. Even the upcoming artist with just one song on radio issues a press release that they’ve bought a mansion in Lekki Phase One and a Range Sport SUV?

There was a time when it was strongly whispered that Don Jazzy and his crew owned Club Jonzing until the truth came out. You must have also heard that D’banj owns Koko Lounge. My brothers and sisters in habit of believing everything you hear, I wish you all knew how your favourite celebs laugh in their closet seeing you swallow the lies like fufu and draw soup. Let me give an example of how some artistes can be terrible liars, we were on a tour of five Nigerian cities with Basketmouth and his then Humour Unlimited monthly show sponsored by BAT. When we got to Enugu, a certain artiste was snoring like a broken trailer exhaust pipe in the bus on our way from the event centre to the hotel. I tapped him hoping to stir him up to reduce his noise but I was shocked when he woke up immediately swearing that he wasn’t snoring, that he was only trying to get our reaction. Our reaction? After snoring for about 20 minutes with a trail of saliva from one corner of his mouth to his shirt collar! O’boy some people can lie in Africa.

Did you hear it on breaking news when Iyanya bought a house in his dreams? His management must have thought it was a fantastic promo strategy then. If only they knew that not far into the future, Iyanya would be dragged by his balls across the floor of the internet, and that his aggrieved brother would take to twitter to inform everyone that Iyanya had been evicted (not from Project shame) from his dream mansion. Yes, it is double wahala for deadi-bodi and the owner of deadi-bodi but won’t it be tripple wahala for Oritsefemi and his management when fans eventually discovered that the N200m mansion he purportedly bought some months back was actually bought in his dreams and not in the real world?

How much does he charge per gig and how long has he been playing these gigs to be able to afford a mansion of that amount? Isn’t it wonderful how naija entertainers think their fans and everyone else is shallow and gullible? Common sense should tell every artiste that these lies won’t achieve anything but hurt their careers in the long run when the truth is eventually revealed.

Like it was revealed this week that Wizkid’s car hasn’t been paid for. True, some naija musicians make a lot of money, but not the kind of money they want you to believe. Does Oritsefemi look the part of a N200m house owner even with all his body cream? The telco brand ambassadors who are being coerced into lying about their endorsement fees can’t make such a preposterous claim not to talk of someone with no endorsement deal. I shivered when I saw in some blogs over the week that Genevieve just bought a house in Ghana for a whopping $4m. This will go down as the grandmother of all lies told so far. Genny baybay, you should have asked yourself if there’s any house worth $4m in the whole of Ghana, except you bought the Ghana National Theatre which by the way may not be worth $4m.

These lies are getting dumber by the day. The worst thing that can happen to any man is believing his own lies. If we had a system where entertainers are taxed for their acquisitions, the ridiculous and unnecessary lies will stop. They will speak the truth and nothing but the truth or so help them God.

'The 469 problems of Nigeria' by Etcetera

Saturday, February 21, 2015

An average Nigerian is just a political bystander. Many of them don’t know who their local government chairmen and councillors are and what they are elected to do. But let’s forget about the local government chairmen and councillors; they have never been useful to us, anyway. Let’s talk about the ‘bigger fishes’ — the guys in the National Assembly.

The ordinary Nigerian does not have the constitutional authority to vote on appropriations, but the guys in the National Assembly do. An average Nigerian does not set fiscal policy; our representatives in the National Assembly do. The ordinary Nigerian, even though most of their daily activities revolve around money, does not control monetary policy; the guys in the National Assembly do. The National Assembly consists of the Senate and the House of Representatives, made up of 109 senators and 360 members respectively. When both are added up, it gives 469. These 469 people are the 469 problems the country has been plagued with since 1999.

Let’s take a look at the fraud played on the masses by these 469 men and women. Since 1999, these men and women have spent so much money and energy convincing you and I that the deplorable state of the nation has got nothing to do with them. The disagreement they’ve often had on almost every issue raised on the floor of the House has been blamed on party differences, but in defrauding Nigerians, they have always cooperated and differences in their political parties have never been an issue. They are quick to exonerate themselves and make it seem like the President is the cause of all the country’s problems. They wrote the constitution in a way that the President is shackled only to the powers to propose bills. And they have made it certain that he cannot force them to accept the bills. They fashioned the constitution in a way that it awards them the sole responsibility of originating appropriations. For instance, the Senate President and his fellow senators can approve any budget they want. Even if the President vetos it, they can go ahead and pass it over his veto. They are the people responsible for all the problems we are facing as a nation.

Since 1999, these 469 men and women have effortlessly dangled over 160 million Nigerians like puppets. Of course, they didn’t forget to tweak the law to shield themselves from prosecutions. Have you heard that no matter the level of crime committed, they cannot be arrested on the grounds of the National Assembly? Mehn, what a job to have! This is by far the easiest job in the country with the fattest remuneration. You get so relaxed that all you do is sleep and snore during deliberations and get paid for it. For Christ’s sake, who gets paid for sleeping and snoring? It has become very inconceivable to me that a country of over 160 million people cannot replace these 469 men and women who stand convicted by the present facts of incompetence and irresponsibility. It will do us a whole lot of good if everyone of these men and women is voted out and replaced with fresh thinkers in the coming general elections.

You can’t think of a single problem we are facing as a nation — from bad roads to the decay in our education and health sector and non-implementation of budgets — that is not traceable to these 469 guys. When you really understand the truth that these guys exercise so much power than any other arm of government, then you will understand that what exists is what they want to exist. If the state allocations are unfair, it is because they want it unfair. If the national treasury is empty, it is because they want it empty. If our soldiers are deployed anywhere, it is because they want them there. There are no insoluble government problems. These 469 men and women are damn lazy, even lazier than our court judges and their white lazy wigs. Let’s stop allowing these 469 men and women in the ancient trade of laziness transfer the blames of their incompetence to other arms of government, whom they hire and whose jobs they can abolish whenever they want.

Let’s stop them from further fooling us with the same lame excuses of the existence of cabals and mystical forces affecting the economy and causing inflation. They have blamed these mystical forces as what prevent them from doing what they took oaths to do. These 469 men and women alone should be held responsible for every setback we have as a nation. They and they alone have the power, so they and they alone should be held accountable by the masses who are supposed to be their bosses, that is if Nigerians are enlightened enough to know that they have the power as bosses to fire or recall anyone of these lazy 469 representatives back to their constituencies.

Just in: Election Fever by Etcetera

Saturday, February 07, 2015

The growing speculation that the elections might be postponed speaks volumes of someone’s election jitters. But who will it benefit most between Maj. Gen. Muhammadu Buhari (retd.) and President Goodluck Jonathan if the elections are postponed? The Independent National Electoral Commission had four years to prepare for February elections. How come it waited till the 11th hour to start distributing PVCs? Nawa ooo.

People should know that no amount of scheming and manoeuvring can stop Nigerians now. The much clamoured change must be achieved, especially now that the masses have become more politically conscious and every discuss around the country over the past few weeks has been centred on politics. Politicians who have been blinded to the plight of the people should realise that mere rhetoric won’t cut it for them anymore. Nigerians are demanding for a change. The people are not smiling anymore. Whether it is a new regime taking over or a return of the incumbent, whoever takes the seat better know that a better Nigeria is non negotiable anymore.

It is a shame it took us this long to realise the power we have as a people. But it will be the funeral of any politician who’s dumb not to realise that it won’t be business as usual and that their campaign for re-election is by providing the dividends of democracy from the very minute they are sworn into office. I guess if someone told President Jonathan that Buhari is going to have a huge support from the masses, he would have done more to secure his place for another term by providing the basic amenities demanded by the people. Getting re-elected shouldn’t be difficult for any public office holder who has the interest of the people at heart.

Elections are zero-sum affairs. The more the Nigerian people perceive the incumbent as successful the less likely they are to vote for the opposition in the next election. And delivering democratic dividends (not just on billboards or on pages of newspapers), undercuts the whole logic of the opposition’s campaign against any incumbent or the incumbent’s party’s continuation in office.

Is Governor Babatunde Fashola of Lagos State the Director General of Buhari and Akin Ambode’s campaign group. As governor, he is the father of everyone in the state including Jimi Agbaje, Ambode and every other contestant. He shouldn’t be replying or throwing jabs at any contestant no matter the political parties they represent. With Agbaje’s tax issue, the governor should have directed the Lagos State Inland Revenue Service to look into the matter and if Agbaje is found wanting, he should be referred to INEC for appropriate sanctions.

Whoever is in charge of Ambode’s campaign team should be given a raise. A couple of weeks back, a lot of lagosians including myself didn’t know who Ambode is. In fact, I had to call friends in Alausa to inquire about him. But judging from the awareness his campaign has generated in just a few weeks, if the governorship election of Lagos State is decided by that, your guess is as good as mine.

Lagos State is officially looking like one big political photo album or the living room of a wall paper merchant. Every wall or fence in the state is covered with campaign posters of all sort. I thought Lagos State government placed a ban on pasting of posters in the state. Or is the ban meant for only entertainers? Well, now I guess those guys pasting those white tacky A4 size posters with “House-girl or Plumber needed” have gotten all the encouragement they need.

I think Buhari has attended more church services than many Christians in the past weeks. Is he not trying too hard to convince us that he is not a religious fanatic? At this age and time, we should be discouraging sentiments in politics. Using the church for political campaigns is not exactly doing that. One question is, is Buhari or Jonathan going to church to give their lives to Christ and be born again? Should the church be allowed for political campaigns? If a pastor chooses to hire out his church auditorium for campaigns, is the congregation supposed to be included as part of the deal? We attend church on Sundays to hear the unadulterated word of God and not to listen to manifesto recitals.

Did Buhari pull out of the presidential debate for the same reasons given by his party? Well, we are not buying all that gist. I think it is the soldier in Buhari that took that decision. Being a good soldier goes beyond matching to war. It is also knowing when to go to war and when to sit at home. Buhari’s decision was smart indeed and I would have done the same if I was in his position. As weird as it sounds, he doesn’t seem like someone who can beat Jonathan in a debate. I have already pictured Jonathan entering the debate with a confident grin on his face like a kid strolling to receive his report card in front of his parents, knowing he had come first in class. A debate between Jonathan and Buhari would have been like a boxing bout between Mike Tyson and Bash Ali. There’s only one outcome. TKO!

The last letter from Dr. Ameyo Adadevoh before she knew she had contacted Ebola

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Dr. Ameyo Adadevoh is being celebrated as a hero in the battle against Ebola in Nigeria. She was the consultant on duty when Nigeria’s index patient, Patrick Sawyer arrived at First Consultants Medical Centre at Obalende, Lagos.

Adadevoh, who was 58 at the time of her death contracted the deadly disease from Sawyer and passed away three days ago.

Below is her last correspondence which was a letter from the hospital to the Lagos and Federal governments co-signed by Dr. Ohiaeri, a colleague at the First Consultants Medical Centre. It was written after the death of the Liberian who brought the disease to Nigeria.

Ameyo Adadevoh

Read below:

“In the interest of our patients, staff, the general public the nation at large we state the following:

“A 40-years old gentlemen came into the hospital with symptoms suggestive of Malaria (Fever, headache, extreme weakness) on Sunday night (20th July 2014). He was fully conscious and gave us his clinical history and told us he is a Senior Diplomat from Liberia. Laboratory investigations confirmed malaria whilst other test for HIV, Hepatitis B&C were negative. He was admitted and treatment commenced.

“However, due to the fact that he was not responding to treatment but rather was developing haemorrhagic symptoms we further questioned him. He denied having been in contact with any persons with EVD (Ebola Virus Disease) at home, in any hospital or at any burial.

“In spite of this denial we immediately decided to do the following:

1. To conduct further tests for possible Infectious Haemorrhagic Disease, especially EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE, based on the fact that he was a Liberian citizen and the recent ourbreak of EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE in that country

2. We immediatrly isolated/quarantined the patient, commenced barrier nursing and simultaneously contacted the Lagos State Ministry of Health and the Federal Ministry of Health to enquire where furthe laboratory tests could be performed as we had a high index of suspicion of possible EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE

3. WE REFUSED FOR HIM TO BE LET OUT OF THE HOSPITAL IN SPITE OF INTENSE PRESSURE, AS WE WERE TOLD THAT HE WAS A SENIOR ECOWAS OFFICIAL AND HAD AN IMPORTANT ROLE TO PLAY AT THE ECOWAS CONVENTION IN CALABAR, CROSS RIVER STATE.

4. The initial test results from LUTH laboratory indicated a signal of possible EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE, but required confirmation.

5. We then took the further step of reaching out to Senior Officials in the office of the Secretary of Health of the United States of America who promptly assisted us with contacts at thecentres for Disease Control (CDC) and World Health Organisation Regional Laboratory Centre in Senegal.

6. Working jointly with the State, Federal Agencies and Internaional Agencies, we were able to obtain confirmation of EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE (ZAIRE STRAIN), (W.H.O. Regional Center Lab-Senegal/Redeemes lab/LUTH Laboratory)

7. The gentleman subsequently died on Friday at a 6.50 (25th July, 2014)

8. All agencies were promptly notified and in consultation with W.H.O, Regional EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE Centre in Conakry, Guinea and Best Practices, the following was commenced:

a. Orderly temporay shut down of the hospital with immediate evacuation of in house patients

b. The appropriate professional removal of the body and its incineration under W.H.O. guidelines witnessed by all appropriate agencies.

9. Having concluded the above, it is now appropriate to give this Press release in the interest of our partient, staff, the general public and the nation at large.

10. In keeping with W.H.O, guidelines, hospitals is shut down briefly as full decontamination exercise is currently in progress W.H.O. Guidelines

In conclusion working with the STATE, FEDERAL AND INTERNATIONAL AGENCIES, we were able to identify and confirm the diagnosis of the EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE. We hope that by our action of preventing this gentleman from being extracted from our hospital and traveling to Calabar we have been able to prevent the spread of EBOLA VIRUS DISEASE in Nigeria.

The Board and Management of the Hospital wish to thank all our staff members for their diligence and professionalism.

Thank You.

Signed

Dr.B.N.OHIAERI

DR.A.S.ADADEVEOH

First Consultants Medical Centre Limited

The Trent

#BringBackOurGirls: 'BringBackOurGirls' by Arinze Nwafor

Friday, August 22, 2014

BRING BACK OUR GIRLS

What's the update?

I mean about the girls

The girls from Chibok

Stolen from their school

Yes, you now remember

We've waited in plastic chairs

Scattered like stars on the square

Struggling to be their light

Even as the light flickers and wane

We still raise our thinning voices.

Is Sambisa still their cage

Or has it moved?

I thought they had drones and satellites,

Spies that see through trees and men

Did you ask them where the girls are?

Did they eat this morning,

Bathe and learn their ABC?

Do they know that we tweet #BBOG,

That our timelines clog for them?

They said it's day #130

Really, that's annoying

I could throw tantrums and

Drop the F word on you

I guess that's what I'll do

Sanity seems to lack a place right here

So "Hey!!!!

Get the hell in there

And fucking #BringBackOurGirls"!

Arinze Nwafor writes from Enugu, Nigeria.
@ArinzeNwafor8

#GiveAfricaZmapp or #AfricanCure: Challenging Nigeria To Develop Zmapp Ebola Cure

Sunday, August 10, 2014

Necessity is the mother of invention. Today we have twitter campaigns, #GiveAfricaZmapp and #GiveThemExperimentalDrugs. As meaningful as these begging campaigns are, they must not be our only hope at addressing the Ebola plague.

#AfricanCure is directed to the presidents of African nations. Nigeria, the largest and one of the most naturally capable, endowed nations – with resource, wealth and people – is particularly pressed. We can develop an African cure in months. The US insists they will not help us till two years are passed. Let’s accept they have their protocols for manufacture and commercialization of their stuff. We cannot press them. They only test their drugs on our healthy kids, not our dying. They did not test the drug on Sheikh Khan, but did on their citizens for obvious reasons. It is their prerogative. We must define ours too.

African leaders must no longer be allowed to dance and have launch ceremonies when they build roads and repair trains; social services of 1950. It is time we press our leaders to meet up with 2014 demands of life. Necessity is the mother of invention; we must take advantage of our crises to develop our solutions. Iran today is highly developed due to the challenges of decades of cruel sanctions. World wars led to the development and advancement of technologies like the GPS we use today. Indeed in our very own Nigeria, the challenge of the Biafra war saw the East spin out amazing military machines and the seeking solutions in dire times is not unrelated to the advanced productivity of that region today.

Zmapp is not the most complex technological remedy. In fact, this is Bio 101. Recovering and cloning antibodies is the oldest trick in the book for developing immunization to diseases. The Federal Government of Nigeria, FGN is challenged to sit-up and first, collaborate with its Liberian partner. Zmapp serum samples were obtained from a certain African kid who developed antibodies that defeated his Ebola infection. Zmapp antibodies are an African copyright property. The FGN must seek out candidates who have overcome Ebola from whom antibody-laden serum will be harvested. This involves responsibility and cooperation.

Next, the antibodies will be identified in the serum sample by proteomics or other methods, analyzed through peptide digestion and mass spectrometry. Once the monoclonal antibodies are properly identified, these will be purified and cloned for real-time testing on our dying brother and sisters.
As a trained physician and molecular biologist, I submit that this process is not complicated and very feasible to achieve within months if the Nigerian administration is serious. We expect something to be done. It is passed time for African cures to African problems.

Dr. Peregrino Brimah
ENDS.ng
Email: drbrimah@ends.ng
Twitter: @EveryNigerian

PHOTO: Chimamanda Adichie poses for Riposte magazine

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Award winning writer Chimamanda Adichie photographed by one of Nigeria’s best photographers Lakin Ogunbanwo for Riposte Magazine. More photos below...

'The Miraculous Deliverance Of Oga Jona' by Chimamanda Adichie

Saturday, July 19, 2014

A short story written by award winning writer, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Read and share your thoughts..

As soon as he opened his eyes, he felt it. A strange peace, a calm clarity. He stretched.  Even his limbs were stronger and surer. He looked at his phone. Thirty-seven new text messages – and all while he was asleep. With one click, he deleted them. The empty screen buoyed him. Then he got up to bathe, determined to fold the day into the exact shape that he wanted.

Those Levick people had to go. No more foreign PR firms. They should have made that article in the American newspaper sound like him, they should have known better. They had to go. And he would not pay their balance; they had not fulfilled the purpose of the contract after all. Continue...

He pressed the intercom. Man Friday came in, face set in a placidly praise-singing smile.
“Good morning, Your Excellency!”
“Good morning,” Oga Jona said. “I had a revelation from God.”
Man Friday stared at him with bulging eyes.
“I said I had a revelation from God,” he repeated. “Find me new Public Relations people. Here in Nigeria. Is this country not full of mass communication departments and graduates?”
“Yes, Your Excellency.” Man Friday’s eyes narrowed; he was already thinking of whom he would bring, of how he would benefit.
 “I want a shortlist on my table on Wednesday,” Oga Jona said. “I don’t want any of the usual suspects. I want fresh blood. Like that student who asked that frank question during the economic summit.”
“Your Excellency… the procurement rules…we need somebody who is licensed by the agency licensed by the agency that licenses PR consultants…”
Oga Jona snorted. Man Friday used civil service restrictions as a weapon to fight off competition. Anybody who might push him out of his privileged position was suddenly not licensed, not approved, not registered. “I don’t want you to bring your own candidates, do you hear me? I said I want fresh blood, I’m not joking.”
“Yes, Your Excellency,” Man Friday said, voice now high-pitched with alarmed confusion.
“Put that DVD for me before you go,” Oga Jona said.

He watched the recording on the widescreen television, unhappy with his appearance in the footage. His trousers seemed too big and why had nobody adjusted his hat? Next to The Girl from Pakistan, he looked timid, scrunched into his seat. She was inspiring, that young girl, and he wished her well. But he saw now how bad this made him appear: he had ignored all the Nigerians asking him to go to Chibok, and now The Girl From Pakistan was telling the world that he promised her he would go. He promised me, she said. As if the abducted Nigerian girls did not truly matter until this girl said they did. As if what mattered to him was a photo-op with this girl made famous by surviving a gunshot wound. It made him look small. It made him look unpresidential. It made him look like a leader without a rudder.  Why had they advised him to do this? He pressed a button on his desk and waited.
Violence was unfamiliar to Oga Jona. Yet when Man Monday came in, his belly rounded and his shirt a size too tight as usual, Oga Jona fought the urge to hit and punch and slap. Instead, he settled for less: he threw a teacup at Man Monday.
“Why have you people been advising me not to go to Chibok? Why have you people been telling me that my enemies will exploit it?”
“Sah?” Man Monday had dodged the teacup and now stood flustered.
“I am going to Chibok tomorrow. I should have gone a long time ago. Now it will look as if I am going only because a foreigner, a small girl at that, told me to go. But I will still go. Nigerians have to see that this thing is troubling me too.”
“But Sah, you know…”
“Don’t ‘Sah you know’ me!” This was how his people always started. “Sah, you know…” Then they would bring up conspiracies, plots, enemies, evil spirits. No wonder giant snakes were always chasing him in his dreams: he had listened to too much of their nonsense. He remembered a quote from a teacher in his secondary school:  ‘The best answer to give your enemies is continued excellence.’ What he needed, he saw now, was an adviser like that teacher.
“Sah, the security situation…”
“Have you not seen Obama appear in Afghanistan or Iraq in the middle of the night to greet American troops? Is Chibok more dangerous than the war the Americans are always fighting up and down? Arrange it immediately. Keep it quiet. I want to meet the parents of the girls. Make gifts and provisions available to the families, as a small token of goodwill from the federal government.” He knew how much people liked such things. A tin of vegetable oil would soften some bitter hearts.
“Sah…”
“From Borno we go to Yobe. I want to meet the families of the boys who were killed. I want to visit the school. Fifty-nine boys! They shot those innocent boys and burnt them to ashes! Chai! There is evil in the world o!”
“Yes Sah.”

“These people are evil. That man Yusuf was evil. The policemen who killed him, we have to arrest them and parade them before the press. Make sure the world knows we are handling the case. But it is even more important that we tell the true story about Yusuf himself. Yes, the police should not have killed him. But does that mean his followers should now start shedding blood all over this country? Is there any Nigerian who does not have a bad story about the police? Was it not last year that my own cousin was nearly killed in police detention? Let us tell people why the Army caught him in the first place. He was evil. Remember that pastor in Maiduguri that he beheaded. Find that pastor’s wife. Let her tell her story. Let the world hear it. Show pictures of the pastor. Why have we not been telling the full story? Why didn’t we fight back when The Man From Borno was running around abroad, blaming me for everything when he too failed in his own responsibilities?” Oga Jona was getting angrier as he spoke, angry with his people, angry with himself. How could he have remained, for so long, in that darkness, that demon possession of ineptitude?
“Yes Sah!”
 “You can go.”

He picked up the iphone and spoke slowly. “I want to expand that Terror Victims Support Committee. Add one woman. Add two people personally affected by terrorism. How can you have a committee on terrorism victims with no diversity?”
On the other end of the phone, the voice was stilled by surprise. “Yes Sah!” Finally emerged, in a croak.
He put down the phone. There would be no more committees. At least until he was re-elected. And no more unending consultations. He picked up the Galaxy, scrolled through the list of contacts. He called two Big Men in the Armed Forces, the ones stealing most of the money meant for the soldiers.
“I want your resignation by Friday,” He said simply.
Their shock blistered down the phone.
“But Your Excellency…”
“Or you want me to announce that I am sacking you? At least resignation will save you embarrassment.”
If those left knew he was now serious as commander-in-chief, serious about punishing misdeed and demanding performance, they would sit up. He ate some roasted groundnuts before making the next call. To another Big Man in the Armed Forces. They had to stop arresting Northerners just like that. He remembered his former gateman in Port Harcourt. Mohammed, pleasant Mohammed with his buck teeth and his radio pressed to his ear. Mohammed would not even have the liver to support any terrorist.  He told the Big Man in the Armed Forces, “You need to carry people along. Win hearts and minds. Make Nigerians feel that you are fighting for them, not against them… And when you talk to the press and say that Nigerians should do their part to fight terrorism, stop sounding as if you are accusing them. After all, let us tell the truth, what can an ordinary person do? Nothing! Even those people who check cars, if they open a boot and see a big bomb, what will they do? Will they try to subdue an armed suicide bomber? Will they pour water on the bomb to defuse it? Will they not turn and run as fast as their legs can carry them? Let’s start a mass education campaign. Get proposals on how best to do it without scaring people. When we tell Nigerians to report suspicious behavior, let’s give them examples. Suspicious behavior does not mean anybody wearing a jellabiya. After all, was the one in Lagos not done by a woman?” He paused.
“Yes, Your Excellency!”
“As for the girls, we have to go back to negotiation. Move in immediately.”
“Yes, Your Excellency.”
“I should not have listened to what they told me in that Paris summit. Why did I even agree to follow them and go to Paris, all of us looking like colonised goats?”
From the other end, came a complete and lip-sealed silence. The Big Man in the Armed Forces dared not make a sound, lest it be mistaken as agreement on the word ‘goat.’ Besides, he had been part of the entourage for that trip and had collected even more than the normal fat juicy estacode.
“I don’t want to hear about any other mutiny,” Oga Jona continued. “You will get the funds. But I want real results! Improve the conditions of your boys. I want to see results!”
The Big Man in the Armed Forces started saying something about the Americans.
Oga Jona cut him short. “Shut up! If somebody shits inside your father’s house, is it a foreigner that will come and clean the house for you? Is Sambisa on Google Maps? How much local intelligence have you gathered? Before you ask for help, you first do your best!”
“Yes Your Excellency.”
“And why is it that nobody interviewed the girls who escaped?”
There was a pause.
“By tomorrow night I want a report on the local intelligence gathered so far!”
“Yes, Your Excellency.”
Oga Jona turned on the television and briefly watched a local channel. Who even designed those ugly studio backgrounds? There was a knock on the door. It had to be Man Thursday. Nobody else could come in anyhow.
“Good afternoon, My President,” Man Thursday said.
Short and stocky, Man Thursday was the soother who always came cradling bottles of liquid peace.
This time, Oga Jona pushed away the bottle. “Not now!’
“My President, I hope you’re feeling fine.”
“I received a revelation from God. From now on, I will stop giving interviews to foreign journalists while ignoring our own journalists.”
“But My President, you know how useless our journalists are…”
“Will Obama give an interview to AIT and ignore CBS?”
“No, Your Excellency.”
“I know some of our journalists support Bourdillon, but we also have others on our side. I will beat them at their game! I want to do interviews with two journalists that support us and one journalist that supports Bourdillon. Find one that will be easy to intimidate.”
“But…”
“I want names in the next hour.”
“Yes, Your Excellency.” Man Thursday now stood still, lips parted in the slack expression of a person no longer sure what day it was.
 “Tell the Supporters Club to change their television advertisements. They should stop mentioning ‘those who are against me.’ I will no longer give power to my enemies. They should mention only the things that I am doing. I like that one with the almajiri boy. It shows Nigerians that I have helped with education in the North. They should make more advertisements like that.”
In response, Man Thursday could only nod vigorously but mutely.

Later, after eating vegetable soup with periwinkle and a plate of sliced fruits – he was determined to keep himself from looking like Man Monday – he asked Sharp Woman to meet him in the residence. Not in the main living room, but in the smaller relaxing white parlor. Sharp Woman was the only one he fully trusted. He had sometimes allowed himself to sideline her, when he had felt blown this way and that way by the small-minded pettiness of other people. She was the only one who had not allowed him to dwell too much on his own victimhood. Once, she had told him quietly, “You have real enemies. There are people in this country who do not think you should be president simply because of where you come from. Did they not say they would make the country ungovernable for you? But not everything is the fault of your enemies. If we keep on blaming the enemies then we are making them powerful. The Bourdillon people are disorganized. They don’t have a real platform. Their platform is just anti-you. They don’t even have a credible person they can field, the only major candidate they have is the one they will not select. So stop mentioning them. Face your work.”
He should have listened then, despite the many choruses that drowned her voice.

It was she who, a few days later, and after the four rubbish candidates stage-managed by Man Friday, brought the new PR people, Kikelola Obi, Bola Usman and Chinwe Adeniyi – when he first saw their names, he thought: and some crazy people are saying we should divide Nigeria. They were in their early thirties, with rough faces and no make up; they looked too serious, as if they attended Deeper Life church and disapproved of laughter. They started their presentation, all three taking turns to speak. They stood straight and fearless. Their directness and confidence unnerved him.
“Sir, we voted for you the first time. We felt that you would do well if you had the mandate of the people instead of just an inherited throne. We liked you because you had no shoes. We really liked you. We had hope in you. You seemed humble and different. But with all due respect sir, we will not vote for you again unless something changes.”

He nearly jumped up from his seat. Small girls of nowadays! They had no respect! As if to make it worse, one of them added that if the election were held today, the only person she could vote for was The Man From Lagos. Oga Jona bristled. That annoying man. Even if a mosquito bit him in his state, he would find a way to blame the president for it. Still, Oga Jona could see why these foolish small girls were saying they would vote for him. The man had tried in Lagos. But their mentioning The Man From Lagos was now a challenge. He would rise to the challenge.

“Sir, the good news is that Nigerians forgive easily and Nigerians forget even more easily. You have to change strategy. Be more visible. Stop politicizing everything. Stop blaming your enemies for everything. You have to be, and seem to be, a strong, uniting leader. Make sure to keep repeating that this is not a Muslim vs. Christian thing.”
Oga Jona cut in, pleased to be able to challenge these over-sabi girls. “You think Nigerians don’t know that it is mostly Christian areas that they are targeting in Borno? And what about all those church bombings?”
The three shook their heads, uniformly, like robots. They were sipping water; they had declined everything else.

“With all due respect sir, if you look at the names of bombing victims, they are Muslims and Christians. If God forbid another terror attack occurs, you have to come out yourself and talk to Nigerians. Stop releasing wooden statements saying you condemn the attacks. We will prep you before each public appearance. You have a tendency to ramble. That’s the most important thing to watch out for. Be alert when you answer each question. Keep your answers short. You don’t have to elaborate if there is nothing to elaborate. Stick to the point. If they ask you something negative, be willing to admit past mistakes but always give the answer a positive spin. Something like ‘yes, I could have handled it better and I regret that but I am now doing better, and am determined to do even more because Nigerians want and deserve results.’ You have to start reaching out beyond your comfort zone. Nigeria has talent. Look for the best Nigerians on any subject at hand, wherever they may be, and persuade them to come and contribute on their area of expertise. Especially the ones who have no interest in government work. Even one or two who don’t completely agree with you. Think of Lincoln’s Team of Rivals.”

“What?”

“Don’t worry, sir. The important thing is to reach out beyond your circle. Oga Segi was not a calm person like you. He even used to threaten to flog people. But he had a good network. Jimmy Carter is his friend. If he needed expertise from a university in Zaria or Edinburgh or Boston, he would pick up his phone and know somebody who knew or somebody who knew somebody who knew. But with all due respect, sir, you don’t have that. Bayelsa is a small place.”
These girls really had no respect o! He glared at Sharp Woman, who shrugged and muttered, “You said you wanted people who would tell you the truth.”
But he listened.

In his first interview, the words rolled off his tongue. Those girls had made him repeat himself so many times. “I want to apologize to the Nigerian people for some actions of my government. We could have done better. No country fighting terrorism can let everything be open. But we owe our country men and women honest, clear assurance that we are taking decisive action, with enough details to be convincing. I ask for your prayers and support. I have directed the security services to set up a website that will give Nigerians accurate and up-to-date information about our war against terrorism. I have also hired specialists to manage the flow and presentation of the information.”
And the words came easily when he shook hands with the parents in Chibok, simple polite people who clutched his hand with both of theirs. He should have done this much earlier; it was so touching. “Sorry,” he said, over and over again. “Sorry. Please keep strong. We will rescue them.”
The words were more reluctant when he wore a red shirt and asked to be taken to the gathering of The People in Red at the park. But he cleared his throat and urged himself to speak, particularly because, as he emerged from within his circle of security men, the People in Red all stopped and stared. Silence reigned.

“I came to salute you,” Oga Jona started. “We are on the same side. My government has made mistakes. We are learning from them and correcting them. Please work with us. Together, we will defeat this evil.”

They were still silent and still staring; they were disarmed. He thanked them and, before they could marshal their old distrust, he turned and left. That night, as he sank to his knees in prayer, he heard the muted singing of angels.

Chimamanda Adichie is an award winning writer and author of bestsellers including Purple Hibiscus, Half of a Yellow Sun, The Thing Around Your Neck and Americanah.

Nmaju Emeka: What Went Wrong?!

Wednesday, May 07, 2014

The fields are all wild but the labourers are few.
Helter skelter have the sheep gone since the shepherds had fallen asleep.
The buttocks has brought shame to the face since the mouth that eats is so committed.
The mother has forced her children to suck wounds, preserving breast for her concubine.
How sudden has this peaceful and lovely house turn to a house of horror.

She cried her eyes out when she realized that her father's promise is like water poured on a rock
Her pillow is now soaked in tears on realizing that her brothers love for her has waxed cold.
Could this be that her fate now lies in the hands of the enemy,
Now she is bound to take a drastic decision even though her bleeding heart is gripped with fear of the unknown.

Sometimes it pains so much to bear,
Sometimes it rains so much to care,
Sometimes she wishes her brother can look into her eyes and tell her WHAT WENT WRONG!
What crime she has committed.
Could this be a movie or a reality show?
All this actions, are they in the script...?
All this actions are they for a purpose?
Sometimes she wishes her brother will look into her eyes and tell her the future that comes from destructions.

Yesterday it was boys, today its girls,
Yesterday it was the church, today it's the mosque,
Yesterday it was the streets, today its the park,
Yesterday it were the homes, today its the schools,
Yesterday it was the offices, today its the market place...

Yes it is written in the scriptures that "...Kingdoms shall rise against Kingdoms, ...and because of the increase of wickedness, the love of many will grow cold."
But why...why have you chosen to be the victim of this prophesy?
"This land is ours to plough and not to plunder".

Remember GOD is never mocked
Whatsoever a man sows, that he reaps
Ask Judas.
Dear brother, to err is human, to forgive is Divine.

#BRINGBACKOURGIRLS
#THINKBEAUTIFUL

Twitter: @thinkpoetry @respledent96

#BringBackOurGirls: We Can’t Wait To Have Our Girls Back – Soyombo Ayomikun

Thursday, May 01, 2014

From the jaws of hideous monsters

   From the very gates of hell

   Before their voices get silenced forever

   Please bring back our girls

   From the grips of dark warlords

   Whose hearts have for long been lost

   Dark spirits that upon our land have declared a war

   Please bring back our girls

  We don’t even know

   If they’re being killed daily

   If they’re being raped daily

   Whatever is going on there our plea remain

   That you please bring back our girls

   Our homes in Chibok are missing them

   Their siblings want to hold them again

   The mosques where they prayed wants to welcome them back

   Their churches want to do a thanksgiving

   Just please bring back our girls

   Now is not the time

   To be parading ourselves as giants

   If Nigeria alone cannot win this war

   Please seek help wherever it can be found

   We don’t really care how it’s gotten

   But victory,at whatever cost,is our desire

   For our cracked lips of clay to again blossom with smiles

   Please bring back our girls

   At this sore moment

   Campaigns are meaningless to us

   We want to feel secured again

   In our homeland,at our yards

   We want to see the chains of terror destroyed

   We want to be drowned by sanity

   We want serenity wherever we turn

   Such that if a pin should drop,its impact will echoe through our land

   In pains humbly we again ask

   That you please bring back our girls

  Time is ticking

   Souls from Sambisa are praying

   Chibok is on its toes

   Nigeria is waiting

   When we wake up tomorrow

   The news we want is that of victory

   For you,our military,please summon more courage

   Our hearts are with you,our spirits are not sleeping

   Our classrooms in Chibok are awaiting our angels

   Please bring back our girls, safely!

Soyombo Ayomikun tweets from @alabaster85